Random Thoughts

I wonder if Mark Shapiro is still bitter that he wasn’t nominated for Best Supporting Actor in Moneyball. The dude practically launched Jonas Hill’s career in that movie, and now his portrayal of John Hart is forgotten.

To all these goobers clamoring about going to Canada if Trump is elected: hey, you dumb bastards, an America with Trump at the helm is still infinitely better than Canada. Quit being such worry warts. In the long run, civil wars promote prosperity, especially if there is a catchy slogan involved: The Reconstruction 2: This Time, Let’s Do It Right!

Twitter makes this species dumber, but probably speeds up Selective Darwinism, so  everything washes in the end.

The Indians set fire to a big pile of money today when they officially signed Juan Uribe. They could have given that money to some local kids’ charities and received more production than what they will receive from THE FAT FOSSIL.

Boo hoo hoo. Gerrit Cole is upset because he didn’t get more money from the Pittsburgh Pirates even though he is not arb eligible and was awarded an eight million dollar signing bonus. Life is tough, youngster. Go back to school and earn a degree in contract law.

Abraham Almonte has been suspended for eighty days for banned substances. Poor Abe.

Bernie Kosar will be at the Ford Auto Show this Wednesday at the IX Center in Cleveland because Cleveland never forgets a hero, especially when he was the third best QB is his division when he played.

The Cavs have lost two in a row, and are 6-4 over their last ten games, so the head coach should be fired any day.

It will be 90 degrees in Goodyear, Arizona this week. HYDRATE OR DIE!

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